I’m so fucking exhausted! Insomnia drops streaks of white like snow falling in a hurry. It’s been dark for hours and thoughts fall heavier by the minute I’m trying to find peace but instead, my body tightens through the shoulders, fettled by expectation, exhausted wanting to breathe length in my form. Here I am lengthening, reach, … More Insomnia, streaks of self-entanglement
I’m trying to talk to you, anxiety’s on this freeway too, you are trying to follow your friend’s car in a town that’s new to only me. but, then my purse spills out every stray stowage out of my car and I’m trying to drive and grab my purse floating above my head Fuck, above … More Anxiety’s glaring distractions
Fuck off my beat Fuck off my rhythm Don’t steal it from me Try, vetting your own, go ahead bounce to that fro to be for me Underlapped, stabbing at edges, dat rhythm, get dat beat! Where’s the one? I’ll hold it in my thin hands I’m a holder Holder of tongues Of bong … More On your mark…
My bones flutters from the basic terror that inhabits my daily struggle. . Struggle forward. . My rickety but willfully unable body. I’ll stay strong in reserve. . But at last the sweet release of rest, of consciousness paused. . Then. Before the dreams formed of realist trample this once lucid ground. Usually for dreams, … More ruminations before bed, 12.3.18
“Unmedicated, dedicated, ready to live” comes from an army phrase I picked up from my fiance who’s an Army veteran. The original phrase is “medicated, dedicated, ready to kill!”
Well, a lot of soldiers in the army have mental illness and are medicated for it. Thus, “medicated, dedicated, ready to kill.” … More Unmedicated, dedicated, ready to live.
“It’s convenient and safe.
Edges of shoes find a home along with my speraticly exposed spine. Boots and sneakers will remain untouched by rational hands. I’m a fettle spineded lumpy circle among the cotton blankets and pillows.” … More Edges of my Eye
“One of us will die without the relief of leaving the other. That part of my brain that’s not neurotypical. I wouldn’t just leave me.
There has to be a break, there has to be a reprieve from these attacks born within.
Unregulated and unmedicated is no way to live and no one should have too.
This unholy union of mental illnesses and life do not co-exist.” … More Depression brian’s a bitch.